My Place Under The Sun

Thursday, March 17, 2005

The Art of Saying "NO"

For one reason or another, we Filipinos find it hard to say "No". Either we beat around the bush or we just laugh. Why is it that we can't say this two-letter word? Would it be because we are afraid that people might think of us negatively? or that they would not approach us ever again?

Whatever it is, I think it's just right that people think before they ask anything from us. People sometimes have the tendency to keep asking you for favors just because they know it's your expertise or simply because they know you can do it. That is, without considering the fact that you might have something else to do or maybe just the fact that you have something called "life' to live.

Learning to say "No" is not that bad at all. While people may become aloof, which by the way isn't such a bad thing, it'll make them become more considerate.

3 Comments:

  • Not only that some people finds it hard to say No but also expresses their No with hesitations that often leads to the other party to persist.

    Say No by saying No and mean it! Be firm and address the party in a way that convinces them, you mean No and you know it's final.

    Weak No- "I want to do that for you but I am so busy and have lots of things to do. maybe next time I can help you" (This is beating around the bush! This kind of No means Yes?)

    Direct No- " No, I can't do that. I'm sorry but I am very busy and my time (or schedule) won't allow me to do it." (short, firm & sincere.)

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 9:51 AM  

  • i agree with you, and i can identify with the 'weak no'. this is one of the things i would like to practice doing and learn to actually say no.

    By Blogger ten e., at 9:42 PM  

  • from a white boy's perspective, i have no problem hearing the word "no" (used to hearing it from white women!!!haha)... but seriously...it's also possible to say "no" without saying the word. just explain the reasons for the "no" and it becomes obvious what the answer is.

    By Blogger Misha Anissimov, at 3:52 AM  

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